Blogtober #30

Blogtober #30: Facts About You

So it was never specified how many facts you should give. So maybe I'll give 5.

1. I am an introvert as much as I am an extrovert. 

If I am in my room, I am displaying my introverted side, so please leave me in my peace. I just don't wish to speak at this moment. If I am not answering your messages, it is because I cannot be bothered to talk. I don't need to talk to you every minute, of every day, updating you on essentially nothing.

And yet I am an extrovert, I enjoy peoples company, I enjoy meeting up with my friends, making new friends, exploring new places, leaving the comfort of my home. Chatting shit, I can do that. 

2. I am an extremely happy person. It is quite difficult to get under my skin. 

I have been told this on many occasions. Unless you say something TERRIBLE about my family or friends I probably won't have any strong/ill feelings towards you. I don't hold grudges because I forgive quickly, and forget even quicker. 

3. I enjoy driving

I don't enjoy wasting my petrol, so if you want to go somewhere offer up those pennies. I enjoy driving but not being your chauffeur.

4. Sometimes I find myself feeling lonely

By lonely I mean I am missing out on one type of relationship. I have friends and my family, but not another half. So sad, but so true, but then I flick out of it when I remember why I am still single.

Because it is goddam FREEDOM. I go wherever I want when I want, talk to whomever, see whomever and not worry about anybody else, and being in full control of my feelings. 

5. I am very conservative

I may not dress like the most conservative (not that I dress slutty with my boobs out, butt out, thong showing, tightest clothes either) but my personality is very conservative. I find self respect a very important thing. Knowing what you want, from who is also very important. 

I choose, and sometimes I don't choose wisely but I weigh out the pros and cons and don't just think FUCK IT, it's only kissing or it's only sex. 

It means something to me at the end of the day, and I respect me enough to not just give myself away. I also respect the guy enough to show him my interest and disinterest in him. 

I just think this image is quite cool. I mean, it is something we think about when we meet a person, but never really think about. After learning facts about somebody you are also sure to judge them, asking questions in your head like "are you awesome?'. It is cute, funny and accurate all at the same time. 

Blogtober #29:

Blogtober #29: Most Embarrassing Moment

I have had a lot of these. I am just one of those people who always seem to find themselves in a socially awkward position.

For example, SLIPPING ON A KEBAB.

Who slips on a kebab? Me apparently, in front of around 10+ of my friends.

Possibly the most embarrassing was farting in the library.

This was around 5am, our library is 24 hours from Sunday - Friday. 

As a student you just find yourself waking up and walking around at ridiculous times in the morning. 

During exam period, the library can get pretty busy, and people do go there at 5am in the morning.

Well.... as me and my friend were just casually walking around, being idiots, we find ourself in the silent area between the book shelves.

And without any control, I let out a fart.

I know girls don't fart, maybe I'm not a girl.

But that is beside the point.

At 5am in the morning, in the silent area, when my friend is following behind me I LET OUT A FART. It doesn't get anymore embarrassing than that. Apart from the fact that my "friend" is somebody who I had been seeing for around 3 months, DUDE, I am just cursed by the awkward lord. 

Or maybe I am just the most awkward person, doing stupid things like this.

Pray for me. 

Blogtober #28

Blogtober #28: Things You're Superstitious About

I come from a very superstitious family, mainly because we are chinese and the chinese culture is very superstitious. It is totally fine by me because I have grown up this way. Here are the things that are constantly reiterated in my household.

1. No Kneeling

This is for praying and is seen as to be disrespectful when we do it out of context. Sit on your butt on squat instead. Asian squat. 

2. Don't open an umbrella inside the house

This has something to do with ghosts according to our old chinese school teacher. My Grandma has always told me this, but never quite got round to explaining why. I still follow this rule.

3. Whistling at night

Once again this calls for something, like many superstitions it has never quite been explained.

4. Don't brush somebody's foot, or hit them with the broom.

Not quite sure what this one does either, although it is seen as giving bad luck.

5. The number 8

In chinese the number 8 sounds like the word meaning to 'prosper', this is an extremely popular one. When you see a number plate with multiple 8's on it, it is probably a rich chinese person.

6. Bathing with leaves the day/evening before Chinese New Year, other CNY traditions such as not eating meat the day of CNY.

It is seen as good luck and I believe also good for your health.

7. Do not wash your hair or body on CNY.

This is essentially washing away all your good luck you that you are retrieving during CNY.

8. An unmarried couple staying in the same house (if girl) as their parents will bring bad luck to their parents or grandparents. 

Not so sure about this one either, and english culture seems to have changed this for many chinese families in England. But my mum and dad are still pretty superstitious when it comes down to this.

The chinese culture is full of little superstitions, these are very popular ones. Not everybody follows everything, some families follow some more than others, and being in England changes some family dynamics. However, these are the ones my family still seem to follow pretty rigourously.

Blogtober #27

Blogtober #27: A Letter to Your Younger Self

I will put this in lists just because I know how much you I reading lists and will continue to enjoy reading them as I grow up. Lets begin by the things I have learnt and will continue to learn.

1. Always treat your friends and your family right. 

Your sisters aren't there to be your slaves, go and get a bottle of water for yourself, or at least say please. Your friends aren't there for you to push away so you can validate your friendship. Love them because they love you. You'll grow out of this meanness, but was there ever a need to be mean in the first place?

2. It's difficult moving from primary school to secondary school isn't it.

The couple of weeks you spent by yourself, not making any friends, not even hanging around with people but sitting in the locker room eating by yourself. It was hard wasn't it? Don't be sad, because things work out. Also, don't be afraid to make those friends. Don't be afraid to speak to people. Because it eventually worked out right? You made those friends, those "mukateers", who some are still your friends.

3. Your cousins are your best friends, and it is super cool.

How cool is it that your best friends are your cousins? Some people don't understand this, but to you it is normal. Enjoy it, embrace it, you have experienced and will experience so much more with them. Cherish the time, because soon it seems that you are all consumed in your friends that you hardly see each other.

4. Why are you looking at pro-anorexia websites?

There is something sad about being 14 and looking at these websites, to this day I don't even know how you got the idea of these websites and why you were following them. Stop, because it is destructive, it takes a while for you to finally be comfortable with yourself, but just ride that wave out. You'll find you become much more comfortable with yourself.

5. Work hard please (maybe even harder than you already was)

Slacking a little with the science weren't you? You can't blame the teachers but the teachers can't blame you. You wasn't really learning anything because you didn't care to. Maybe care a little more? Just because you are good at one thing and enjoy it, doesn't mean you should ignore the things you aren't good at.

6. Find a hobby and make it count

Try many different things but stick to it. Ballet, what happened to that? Guitar what happened to that? Piano what happened to that? At least continue with something, find something you are passionate about. Because it will be worth it one day. But even if you don't find something enjoy and are passionate about, it's okay because you'll find it one day.

7. Those bad hair decisions.. clothes decisions, those trainers.

Wow, fashion isn't your strong attribute, but it's okay you'll grow into your own.

8. That dream guy won't ever be yours, it's okay because he never really existed, you two weren't meant to be.

Although there is somebody who comes along and REALLY likes you, maybe you should have made it work with him instead? Or maybe it was good that you didn't have to spend all your time and money travelling to meet somebody who wasn't going to be your forever.

9. Embrace the fact you have so much free time

Watching so much television probably isn't the best thing for you, but HEY HO, enjoy it because once you get older staying inside and watching television seems so.. taboo.

10. Make decisions wisely. Are you passionate about this subject or are you just good at it?

The choice of your degree will come and bite you in the butt one day. Choose wisely, if not it's okay because your degree isn't your be all and end all. 

11. Ride the wave

All the ups and downs with him have made you strong. Your naive and trustworthy nature will make you seem so fragile, you are. It's okay let him break you down and build you up. You'll find yourself stronger, maybe even more so than him.

12. Appreciate yourself

Just because he doesn't want you doesn't mean nobody else does. If he makes a mistake move on, don't let him make the decisions. Make decisions for you, not because you don't want to be lonely, but for your inner soul, your happiness, and for your friends, who you have minimal time left with.

13. Speak

You'll learn to do this eventually, but if only you knew you could speak to anybody at anytime. Just do it, it isn't embarrassing and if it is just.. leave, or just laugh it off. Speaking/language and talking is all about fun. Who cares if that person criticises you or judges you, 98% of the people aren't even judging you.

These are all the things I would tell my younger self. After my stint at University I can tell I have changed, A LOT. Before I was naive, nervous, shy, a high achiever, overly attached, slightly lost and lonely. Even though I am still these things beneath, you realise you can change, and to me it is for the better. Change is inevitable as you grow up, so don't accept somebody's reasoning of not talking to you because you "changed".  

Blogtober #26

Blogtober #26: Who Would Play You in A Movie

I find this to be such a strange thing to think about, because it is hardly ever going to happen. If it were though, I would like it to be somebody that I admire. 

The young girl in me is squealing for it to be somebody like Jennifer Lawrence, just because:

1. She is an incredible actress

2. She is incredibly beautiful, and is thin, despite not conforming to the actual "thin stereotypes"

3. She appears to be down to earth and is appreciative of everybody and everything achieved.

4. She seems to have a lot of respect, and I think for a person to play another real life person as a character, they need to respect that person and their achievements.

Who would you want to play you?

Blogtober #25

Blogtober #25: Favourite Book

I know it's so cliche and I sound like a 15 year old girl, however my favourite book is The Fault In My Stars. It is the only book I have ever sat down in one go read it all, it definitely sucks you in, in the best way possible. John Green knows exactly how to capture the hearts of his audience, the concept of the book just warms my heart. How something that could be seen as so negative can be turned into a positive, bringing two strong people together who are just enjoying what they have left.

If you haven't read this please do. Even if you've watched the film, it is definitely worth the read. It's an easy read to, easy on the mind and yet captures your mind and attention entirely. 

I am looking to find more books to read in general, and if its John Green I am going straight to that book. However at the moment it is a little hard to fit in reading for fun during my studies. 

Hopefully soon.

Blogtober #24

Blogtober #24: One Beauty Product You Cannot Live Without

One beauty product I use everyday is Bronzer, I can go light with the eyeshadow, eyeliner and NO LIPSTICK, gloss or lip conditioner, but bronzer is something that I cannot get enough of.

The one I am currently using is Mac Mineralize Skin Finish called "Give Me Sun" which is technically not used as bronzer, but because I am so yellow.. I guess.. it works.

Although I am constantly moving from bronzer to bronzer, the last few weeks I had been using Dior, which I like the consistency and lasts the whole day. However sometimes with my yellow skin town it can look slightly brash. 

My favourite all time will always be the Hoola Benefit Bronzer. Definitely worth a try.

 Mac Mineralize Skin Finish

 Using the Real Techniques Contouring Brush

 Dior

"Life is a journey where you stumble and fall" - Nico & Vinz

It has been a while since I've sat down and just wasted a day like today. I feel relaxed and like my 14 year old self, spending time to reflect on what has been happening and what will be happening in my coming days. Normally these consisted with reading a few inspirational and sentimental posts on Xanga, that was my 15 year old self, most similar to Tumblr of today. As a millennial, I have grown up slightly and moved onto websites such as Thought Catalog and Elite Daily. If you haven't had a chance to read these, I would highly suggest it, even though sometimes it takes up a couple of hours of my day when I've engrossed myself in catching up with all the articles I've missed.

I hadn't read a post in a while that I thought was highly original and which I truly resonated with, until I stumbled across a post written by a girl named Kelsey Hau, "Why I hope my ex was a once in a lifetime kind of love". She put everything so perfectly. I will try to explain why I believe this resonated so perfectly to me in a way as eloquent as her. 

1. Firstly, I understand that my love with my ex was temperamental, the constant fighting. 

It was never ending. Every few days there would be something to argue about. 

"Why are you following him on Instagram..?" 

"I can't see you today." 

All these little comments turning into full blown arguments, for hours, even arguing about who will apologise first. It was these little things. In my mind, all couples argued like this, we all went through this, because why wouldn't you if you loved your 'other half' so much.

2. The feeling of being incomplete without him. 

I somehow found I was constantly trying to fill a void when I wasn't with him. 

Wednesdays and Sundays were "our days", these were the days we would arrange to see eachother. My life with everybody else was planned around this, if he HAD to change plans, so did I. On the days I wasn't with him, I had to find somewhere to be, some friends to hang around with, because I knew as soon as I wasn't with him I was thinking of him, I had to fill a void, because essentially I felt incomplete.

3. Young Love, so passionate and so crazy.

All those late night phone calls that lasted till 3am. Sneaking out of the house when your parents are home. Finding yourself in a different country with them, and not telling your parents. Spending time sneaking into clubs as an underage teen. Spending all your money on buying the perfect anniversary gift, or the perfect birthday gift. Driving an hour and a half twice a week, just to see them. 

All these little things, you cannot replicate, because as adults you lose you have responsibilities. 

He, You, Together are no longer the priority. You find passion in the work you do, the books you read and the people who share the same passions as you who don't require all of your attention.

4. When they leave you, you feel completely and utterly lost.

The second break up, our final official break up was mutual. The first, came completely out of the blue. Once again we were just talking having our late night phone calls. All of a sudden out of nowhere he proceeds to tell me he doesn't know how he feels. Mind you, this was very shortly after my 18th birthday, very shortly after valentines day where we had spent a couple of days on vacation. Everything seemed fine. Until that moment. I felt completely lost, I was crying more than I had before (mind you, I cried a lot during this relationship. Possibly once every week at least). I was so lost, confused, scared that I didn't even want to wake up for school the next day. I found myself lay weeping in bed and finally got the courage to wake up at 11am. To only find myself crying more once I was with my friends. 

This is one of the reasons I would never want to have a relationship like this again. After being together for 2 years at this point, I just felt completely lost.

The following 1 1/2 year was even more difficult, but that is another story to tell. 

I just found everything Kelsey describes was my relationship with him. I was 15-18 during my time with him. It was both the most amazing time, blessed with amazing memories and lessons, and yet one of the most miserable, destructive, painful few years I had. It has taught me a lot of lessons.

People sometimes ask me today why I am single. In my head I can think of numerous reasons. But that is another post to come. 

But to conclude, my ex wasn't perfect, and neither was I. But I genuinely did love him, but I can only speak for me. The time was spent wisely and yet unwisely, and sometimes you just have to see the positive even if you can only remember the worst times. But to this day, I believe I will never want to be in a relationship like that, with a person like that, because loving somebody so deeply only harms yourself in the end.

Blogtober #23

Blogtober #23: Favourite Instagram Editing Apps/Editing Tools for Blog

Currently I only really use one app for Instagram as I have no particular theme. 

I use whitagram to make a white border around my page and that is about all I use. 

To edit photos for my blog I use Adobe Photoshop, however with this also I don't use it very much.

Sorry about the boring post, I just do very little with editing. But as I get more time I am trying my hand at different things.

Name of my instagram: Christineho_

Here's an old photo from Lewes Fireworks and Bomb fire 2013 to demonstrate the only editing I do, haha.

Blogtober #22

Blogtober #22: Pet Peeves

People who don't pick up after themselves. This is just utterly annoying.

WHY OH WHY can you not pick up your dish and put it in the sink, and even at a push maybe wash it? That 1 minute really won't take up much of your day, I promise.

Borrowing stuff and not returning it, does that class as picking up after yourself?

Well, kind of. If you asked to borrow something, just do it out of courtesy or kindness of your heart just to put it back.

To outweigh the negativity of this post, lets leave it with a little something positive.

A positive reminder to embrace the world and give it all your kindness, compassion and grace, because it will all come back to you eventually.

Blogtober #21

Blogtober #21: Dream Vacation

Maldives!

Just look at those magical beaches, it looks secluded enough that you could have a peaceful time, and yet touristy enough that you would be welcomed politely. 

Seeing as it is apparently due to be a destination that is no more due to global warming, this would be a dream to go to and relax. 

Normally I am not really a sun, sea and sand person, but actually when a place is as beautiful as this, it doesn't matter what is there or who. 

Can we just take a moment to admire how beautiful this is?

I mean, who wouldn't want to go here?

To be right next to the sea whilst you are sleeping, listening to the sounds of the waves with the open sea breeze as you sleep.

Blogtober #20

Blogtober #20: Biggest Fear

What scares me most is not being good enough. 

It is not being good enough in the eyes of other people that I am scared of. I know we are constantly told we shouldn't worry about what others think, but it is difficult to avoid what others think. Because even if you don't ask for their opinion, people will always give it to you. 

For some, it just spurts out of their mouth and they can't stop it. It is how they have been raised to be.

I think this always falls into the category of the fear of losing. You don't want to ever feel like you've lost, but it's inevitable. Being not good enough can be personal too. Not just in your professional achievements, but in your personal relationships.

You can be not good enough, the people you are with may find you not good enough. And you will lose them. Losing them sounds like it was your fault, sometimes it is sometimes it isn't. But there is always this fear that you aren't good enough, that they will find somebody better.

Just like a professional relationship, your boss could find somebody better. 

This fear of losing and not being good enough coincides.

I am working on this. 

It takes a little while to grow confidence and not validate your existence, your personality and your appearance from others. 

You probably don't remember your first disappointment, and you probably won't remember your last. We are constantly being disappointed by ourselves, the people around us. But you can't be disappointed by things you don't expect. 

This above quote used to make me feel so wronged, as if somebody else put my hopes high and just disappointed me. 

Just know you yourself can set the standards and the hopes.

Work hard, concentrate, hopes are reachable.

Blogtober #19

Blogtober #19 What Makes You Happy

As corny as it sounds being with my family makes me happy. There just is never a dull moment with them, even if there is you can annoy them until they become annoyed enough that it is entertaining. Being entertained = happy me. 

In all seriousness though it is one of the many things that I find difficult hearing, when people aren't close to their family, don't have good relations or just don't have a big enough family to always have somebody to speak to. With my family it's a never ending conversation, over whatsapp, message, calls, just anything. A family consisting of 4 siblings, and around 50+ cousins, this family isn't small and I am constantly in touch with one of them. 

It makes me happy when I am in their company, because they know me, don't judge me and I know that they will always have my back. Even when we quarrel somehow it ends happy and always does. 

Blogtober #18

Blogtober #18 Share A Secret About You

Secrets, where to begin. I think I am a person full of secrets, not because I have a lot to hide, just that I am a person who finds it hard to open up and just tell people. Do people really care about what is happening on in my life? 

One secret I guess is that at this time in my life I am a little bit of a commitment phobe. Only at this particular time of my life. Just because I feel like I have very little time, and maybe standards for guys that are a little too high. I have just recently been told this. 

As a 20 year old soon to turn 21 it is hard to find somebody who is at a similar stage in life as you, and yet not be too young and immature. So me being a commitment phobe is just me kind of keeping my guard up. It is sometimes easy to get lost in the idea that it would be nice to have somebody, but then you remember that that person will come along. 

Blogtober #17

Blogtober #17: I'm an expert at...

Hiding my feelings. I find it very difficult to speak to people about my feelings, not because I am afraid but more because my problems are never big, we all suffer from sadness sometimes, and sometimes I just find it hard to comprehend that mine should be put before anybody elses. 

The other thing is, when I am around somebody I just feel instantly a little happier, no matter how bad my day has been, I can always forget about it for that instance I am with another person. 

My mind just gets taken off it, and I remember how lucky I am, to have these people and my life.

It is so simple.

But to be honest I am actually not an expert at anything.

Here's a little reminder for the middle of the month. Remember you are lucky. 

Blogtober #16

Blogtober #16: Fall Fashion

Currently my fall fashion pieces are very simple.

Beneath is a compilation of pieces that I wear constantly.

 I can't wait for it to get even colder so it is actually acceptable to wear this scarf everyday.

 I have 4 pairs of Leigh Jeans which I just wear over and over again. I can't get enough. So comfortable.

 Timberlands because the weather in Brighton has just been awful recently, and it makes me appear taller so bonus!

My coat for this autumn/winter season from Zara. So big, so warm, kind of drowns my 5'2 body but I love it nonetheless, for the past few years I have been trying to find a minimal coat that I love, and I think I found it this year!

Blogtober #15

Blogtober #15: Favourite Quote and Why

This is probably my favourite quote, because it is so relevant to all of us. What people think of you shouldn't matter, and those that actually matter probably don't think anything of that silly rap song you just made up in 2 seconds, or that dance that makes you look ridiculously silly. 

What makes it one of my favourites is that it is still so relevant, whenever I read it it is still a little reminder to myself that I shouldn't mind. 

I had so many more quotes that it was so difficult to pick one.

What is your favourite quote and why?

Blogtober #14

Blogtober #14: Favourite Memory From Childhood

I have so many wonderful memories, having a big family does have its wonderful moments and I still experience them now. 

Having been raised partly by my grandma when my parents were busy working, we were always with our cousins, so despite my two youngest siblings having not really shared these memories with us, my cousins and my brother made up for this. We used to do everything together, from the ages of 3 till 15 we pretty much did everything together. We went to the same primary schools, same chinese schools, lived about 10 minute walk apart and we also mingled in the same group of friends. 

We became rebels together, going to London weekly without our parents knowing, going shopping without our parents consent and pretty much guiding ourselves through our education together.

My most favourite memory to date is probably us being around the age of 8 and doing a "fashion show", this meant my brother and my younger cousin being the photographers and my two female cousins, the other photographers brother being the "models". 

We would dress up and prance down the stairs to music that we were all singing, and pretend we were on a runway, at the time we really loved the limelight, and to this day we still don't see why we thought this was a good idea.

Us attending ballet at a really young age. You can tell how much I thoroughly enjoyed these long Wednesday afternoons. 

Blogtober #13

Blogtober #13: Favourite Fall Recipe

So I've never been much of a chef, nor will I expect I will ever be. However I did find a recipe that sounds like something that will appeal to me and my housemates. 

An Autumn Vegetable Soup - courtesy of BBC Good Food

If you would like to find the recipe follow the link below

Link: http://www.bbcgoodfood.com/recipes/1032/autumn-vegetable-soup-with-cheesy-toasts

Sounds so hearty and yet healthy, and something that will make the autumn blues go away if only for the small amount of time whilst enjoying the soup. It is also such a simple recipe, 2 steps for the soup, and the toast if you want something a little fancy like theres just 5 steps.

For more, I would suggest looking on BBC Good Food website, it is incredible.

If you're a student, also considering buying The Ultimate Student Cookbook by Studentbeans. It has some seriously good recipes and so simple for students to follow.

Blogtober #12

Blogtober #12: Best Advice You've Been Given

I'm not one of those people that constantly get advice or have had much of from the past, because I was always the closed type of person, never asking for help, and never showing my emotions. 

The people who have given me the best guidance in my life though, are my parents. There is never a day that goes by that there isn't a little reminder of what they have told me in the past. I have been moulded by my parents and I am proud of that, they have made me into a person I am proud of.

That sounds big headed, but I don't mean I am the perfect human, but I am somebody who is a friend, I don't hold grudges because it only burns the person holding the grudge. That's what they told me.

I am a happy person, because they told me that being unhappy effects the people around you too, and you can change your emotion by changing your outlook on life.

I am a respectful person because they taught me to be, give respect to people and they will respect you back, even if they don't you aren't losing by respecting them, it is simply courtesy, most people appreciate it.

They taught me to respect myself, not everything has to be shared with everybody, especially not your body, the person who is respectful of you will respect you for respecting yourself.

So all in all, is there one piece of advice that is the best from my parents? To be honest no, because they all mean so much to me, and is runs as part of my everyday discourse, and I am so grateful for having such wonderful, inspiring and loving parents.

  

Blogtober #11

Blogtober #11: If I Were President

If I were president I wouldn't know where to begin. There is so much out there to do, and so many people to cater for, who are you to help first, who are you to help without causing harm to anybody else. Every little thing we do will have an effect on another person. 

Do you help the poor?

Do you help the suffering?

Do you help those in other countries worse off then your own?

Do you catch all the criminals first?

So what would you do if you were president?

(Nothing to do with being a president at all, but we all love a cuppa)

Blogtober #10

Blogtober #10: I Never Thought Blogging Would

So this isn't personal, it can't be because blogging hasn't been a full time thing for me, only a part time hobby. By as an avid reader of bloggers it is amazing and exciting to seem them attract so much interest from all different types of media. The likes of Zoella and Tanya Burr make it such an exciting time to be involved in the blogging world.

I remember the days where we all used to have personal blogs, it was like a one up from a personal diary that we could access from anywhere where there was internet. I did it so regularly, except I always used to post my negative emotions, and I get that it can be beneficial to post that, but why focus on the negative. So I am glad that there is a massive platform for blogs now, because I love reading. I was one of those girls who bought 3 magazines every week, every monthly that was available that involved make-up and fashion, so to be able to read hundreds of different blogs around the world that encompass all of this, it is truly inspiring. 

Blogtober #9

Blogtober #9: Worst Halloween Memory #TBT

So I always seem to have bad memories with this person. But actually it just springs to mind, it is not a grudge I hold against any particular person, maybe just the particular person I was at the time. 

Here we are on Halloween, yes, what happened to dressing up I hear you say, I don't know either. But there is a little story behind this, I remember I did buy a costume for this year (maybe robin hood or something) however during this time I was a very insecure girl, I was constantly looking for reassurance, constantly scared of what somebody, others, even him, what they thought of me. I always wondered whether I was good enough, this was no exception. This year had been particularly hard for us, 2012, and it didn't get any easier as the year went on, and so for the worst halloween, this was probably it. Not because of any particular costume, but just the events and emotions. 

Blogtober #8

Blogtober #8: Letter To Yourself in 10years 

This photo was almost 10 years ago now. In another 10 years, I will already be 30. So a letter to myself then. 

I hope you have managed to find the person you have been waiting for. I know it was difficult going through a year or two or how many you went through being by yourself. It can seem lonely, but actually you are not the only one. Your friends are there too, being single does not mean sitting in your room, you are constantly with them, so what did you think you were missing? But despite all that I hope you have found him, the one that can make you happy, but not be crazy. The one who can provide for you, but does not give you everything. The one that lets you have your way, but not all the time. You need that, the person who is willing but knows your attitude enough to not be so lenient towards you, that is lucky, do not let him go. 

I hope you managed to find your way, a job you like with people you like around you. And your family, I hope you are still as close as crazy as you were now. Don't forget the difficult times you had to go through recently, has it become any easier? That little person must be quite old now, how has she grown? I hope you have continued into writing leisurely because it really is fun, maybe you have drifted from it again or you have pursued it full time, who knows. 

At 20, we have so many expectations for when we turn 30. But if you have not achieved everything and met the person you will be with forever yet, just know that the time will come.

The timing for whatever is happening is always right. 

Blogtober #7

Blogtober #7 Best/Worst Vacation:

Best Vacation:

 I would say my best vacation was the one I had last year, lengthy but not too long. 3 weeks I was with my family and also visiting friends. So it was a little of everything. It just made me very nostalgic and actually came at the perfect time. I needed some time away from England after a whirlwind year of changes and heading into my 2nd year of University I needed to just refresh my outlook on life. It was an amazing vacation, although I have been to Hong Kong plenty this was just a little extra special. I had time to reflect on myself and hang out with my family and friends as well as visiting all the places in Hong Kong that I had never seen before. It was fun and a nice little break.

It is always better when you are with your family and not having to pay for food too!

Worst Vacation:

This has got to be Venice. This was actually in the very same year. 2013. You are probably thinking I am crazy for not having a good experience here, however there were countless reasons. 

1. The weather, it was January so it was freezing cold (this however has its drawbacks as well as its benefits, we were told during the summer the canal gets super stinky!)

2. Personal problems, I just came to Venice with the wrong person, it would have been the right person at a different stage in our life but in that moment we were not the same as we had been before. Sometimes you can be with someone who you loved so much trying everything you can to rekindle it, but actually everything is not enough.

3. The food was just not my kind of food. As a foodie I love anything meaty, a protein type of girl, not carbs all the time. 

So overall, I don't think vacations can ever be so bad unless you are with the wrong person/people, so choose wisely who you spend your getaway relaxing time with. 

Blogtober #6

Blogtober #6 10 Things You'd Tell Yourself When You Started Blogging

1. Keep to it, do it everyday if you want.

2. It does not matter who is reading it, don't hide your feelings because certain people are reading it.

3. Don't worry if your friends think you're crazy, so be it, just because they cannot be bothered.

4. More pictures, you bought a camera for a reason, so use it!

5. Why don't you learn web design?

6. That background sure is ugly, it doesn't matter that he made it for you, you can change it if you want.

7. Don't always blog your unhappy feelings, you are happy most of the time.

8. It's also okay if you don't feel like blogging, don't force yourself to pump them out.

9. Comment and like others, you enjoy them so why don't you comment?

10. Take time to read over your mistakes. 

Blogtober #5

Blogtober #5 Your Fall Bucket List

So I haven't really thought about this one yet. There is very little time for me to actually accomplish anything new.

So on my "fall" bucket list, which I assume will end around the end of November time, 

1. I will try to visit at least one of my friends at another University once.

2. Enjoy spending time with my friends as much as possible for this last year.

3. Kick boxing every week, without fail.

4. Go to the teashop in Brighton that everybody raves about (cough, Zoella & other youtubers, cough)

5. High Tea once more!

For now I think that will be it, there isn't a lot you can accomplish in just over a month, especially as a final year University student!

Blogtober #4

Blogtober #4. Favourite photo uploaded from Instagram. 

This would probably have to be a recent post, due to my older posts probably not having much photographic skill, plus me not caring very much about the appearance. 

This is an image uploaded only 2 months ago, during my time in Korea. This image reminds me of the excitement and happiness I felt whilst in Korea, as well as depicting my growth. To me it shows that despite my "loneliness" I am not lonely, I have and was with a friend. The comments on the image also add a little flair, and I love that my family are there to make me laugh. It is also if I say so myself quite a good angle. The wall was also so beautiful and so cute. 

Thus this has become my favourite instagram on my account, so far. 

Blogtober #3

Blogtober #3, One thing you cannot live without. So a thing, an object, a material possession. I would probably say minus the essentials e.g. water, is a book of paper. I mean it would be the only thing where you could actually have it and be able to do something with it without ANYTHING ELSE. Sure a computer would be fun, but without electricity you will not be able to use it. Also without a router you will not have the ability to go on the computer... so paper? People found a way to use things in the wild to write so I am sure I will find something to use. Besides this there is a lot of use with paper, wiping your bum being one of them haha. But also you can do origami, keeping you entertained but also being an essential. 

What would you not be able to live without? 

Be it living without it without ANYTHING else created or what in your opinion is ESSENTIAL to your daily life now?

Grulla. Designed by Roman Diaz and Daniel Naranjo. Folded from 37*37cm MC treatedtissue. (via Kekremsi)

Blogtober #2

Okay, so I have not exactly been keeping up with Blogtober, due to University commitments. I have been so busy just doing some reading, trying to get back into schedule as well as preparing for the future and trying my hand at a couple of new things, at the same time TRYING to stay social and see my friends and family. Here I am updating all in one. So here is #2. 

Dream job when you were little/What is it now?

]I was only a little girl, and all little girls did were dream right? I was always one of those that wanted to a singer, a little dancer or in a dance group. I was the S Club 7 generation that wanted to be a part of the S Club Juniors. Me and my cousins used to dress up in the same outfits and did little performances for our parents, forcing them to watch us dance and sing badly. 

When you grow up you soon realise to become one of these you actually need to have talent, and a little bit of passion and actually wanting to be in the spotlight.

As I have grown up these dreams have changed dramatically. First of all I hate being in the spotlight, so get me behind the curtains as quickly as possible. At the moment I do not have a dream job, there is no job which is that enticing to me that I believe that it is my "dream". Although becoming a full time blogger would be extremely fun and exciting as I enjoy travelling a lot, so travelling blogging, meeting new people would be a dream job I guess. 

What was your dream job and what is it now?

It is funny how much your personality changes as you grow up, and with personality changes come a change of dreams and aspirations too. 

Blogtober #1

The idea is from www.heleneinbetween.com and she has begun a month of blogging everyday. A different theme created for everyday. The 1st on the list for Day 1 is "If you'd won the lottery you'd"

So to begin, If I were to win the lottery I think I would invest 90% of it, only because I am young. I can do what I can now with very little money. I can travel the world and stay at hostels, no matter how much money I have, to travel to world it is always better to see it through places where you wouldn't want to stay. If you were in a hotel, with a lovely pool, hot tub, restaurants selling gourmet food you may as well have stayed at home. If you are to see another country, see it in all its glory spend as little money as possible staying in a sub par hotel/hostel and only go home when you need that 8hrs sleep. So as I am travelling spending that little amount of money I will be making money at the same time. That is the beauty of investment. I have been raised in a chinese household, don't blame me, they love to talk about money and investment. 

So that is basically it, travel and invest. 

If anybody sees this please give it a go, I would really like to delve into peoples minds and see what they would do once they have won the lottery.

Korea Day 7

My final day consisted of a little bit of rest and just some korean bbQ with my host family. However, as it was the last day I kept photos to a minimum, just spending time hanging out with the new friends I made and the family. Below are some lovely pictures they left on my phone so I'll "never forget them" haha, I miss these three already!

So nice to create a bond with these three so quickly because they are all so nice and genuine and I wish them all the best in their year abroad in Korea! I have been following up their tweets/facebook posts/instagrams and I can assure you they are having a blast.

This perfectly depicts our time together in Seoul, just laughing at everything and anything and at any inappropriate moment. 

For the rest of the evening before my departure we played a traditional korean game with all the other guests. This game was so simple yet so difficult to master. You never know how difficult it is to speak and understand another language until you start having to explain a game/understanding game rules.

It is safe to say I helped my "korean team" win, because I was the only English person I had to be in the Korean team, but I did not mind one bit! It meant I was able to play with korean game veterans!

As the plane was landing into HK I realised I had come to the end of my journey. My internship and break in Korea was over. I was going back home. During this long period away from home I had many realisations and had learnt a lot of lessons. I did in a cliche way become a different person, a better one. One that was now more aware of myself and ready to take on the real world with more confidence. Through an internship and travelling alone it taught me we all have a voice. It is a voice that nobody can control but you, say whatever you want to say. If somebody does not agree, let them voice their opinion too. But it does not mean they are right. So speak, speak up and don't be scared of your voice.

And so that was the end of my journey. My life at home was about to begin again. Excited was not the right word because I was more than excited to be away from the heat, get in my car, have some freedom and enjoy some English food.